I was accompanied by my brother when we were heading back towards home from Islamabad on Thursday morning. He was driving while I was scrolling the feeds on my phone. I kept locking it off and unlocking it again, and I am not sure, but it must have been more than fifty times during that short drive. At some point, I realized something strange—why am I so influenced by my phone that even when I have absolutely nothing to do on it, I still pick it up after every few minutes, almost involuntarily? It was as if my hand and my phone had entered into a silent pact, one that my mind could not resist breaking. We are glued to our smartphones. Aren’t we?
This is the quiet truth of our times. Our phones no longer wait for us to need them; they pull us, they whisper to us, they demand our attention even in silence. Psychologists explain that each time we check our phones, we anticipate a small reward—maybe a notification, a message, or a like. That anticipation releases dopamine, a chemical that wires the brain to repeat the behavior. Even when there is no reward, the expectation itself feeds the cycle (Alter, 2017). That is why I kept unlocking my phone in that car—why so many of us pick it up at the dinner table, in the middle of conversations, even during moments of rest. We are no longer choosing; we are reacting.
And when the device isn’t there, the discomfort is real. There’s even a scientific name for it: nomophobia, the fear of being without a mobile phone. Research shows that more than half of adults experience anxiety when their phones are out of reach, out of charge, or turned off (Yildirim & Correia, 2015). Some even report phantom vibrations or notifications—feeling the phone buzz when it hasn’t (Drouin et al., 2012). The phone has become more than an accessory; it feels like an extension of our nervous system, almost like a phantom limb.
But this intimacy comes at a price. A 2020 study found that higher levels of nomophobia were linked to obsessive-compulsive tendencies, interpersonal sensitivity, and excessive hours spent on phones (Gezgin et al., 2018). Another study showed that people with severe nomophobia were 11 times more likely to show dependency behaviors and nearly 14 times more likely to use their phones in dangerous contexts, such as while driving (McDonough). It isn’t just a quirky habit—it is a behavioral condition with real risks.
And it doesn’t stop at anxiety. Our constant checking drains us in ways we barely notice. A 2025 study found that compulsive phone users reported lower physical health, weaker psychological well-being, and poorer social relationships (Ratan et al., 2025). We think we’re connected, but in truth, our energy leaks out with every scroll, every swipe, every false sense of productivity.
The loss goes even deeper. Silence—the fertile soil of human creativity—is gone. We can no longer sit alone with our thoughts. The moment quiet surrounds us, we reach for the device. We can’t bear to wrestle with boredom, even though boredom once forced the human mind toward invention and reflection. Today, even when we listen to spiritual talks or religious recitations, we often want background music to make it more “bearable.” Silence has become unbearable because our brains, trained on dopamine spikes, now interpret it as emptiness. Studies on media multitasking show that heavy users perform worse on attention and memory tasks, becoming more impulsive and less capable of deep, sustained thought (Ophir, Nass, & Wagner, 2009). We are literally training our minds to skim across the surface of life, never diving deep.
And the young are the most vulnerable. A recent longitudinal study of over 4,300 children in the U.S. revealed that nearly half displayed addictive behavior toward mobile phone use, and those who used their phones compulsively were two to three times more likely to experience suicidal ideation. The danger isn’t merely screen time—it’s compulsiveness, the loss of control. A habit that begins with innocent scrolling can evolve into something that eats away at mental health itself.
Phones even reshape how we relate to one another. “Phubbing”—ignoring someone physically present to focus on your phone—has become so common that it barely raises eyebrows anymore. Yet research shows it damages relationships, reducing satisfaction and closeness (Roberts & David, 2016). The phone often wins over the human being in front of us.
And then, there are the physical consequences. Excessive use is linked to sleep disturbances, headaches, poor posture, and even structural changes in the brain. MRI studies show reduced gray matter in areas responsible for control and decision-making among those with problematic smartphone use (Horvath et al., 2020). The device doesn’t just take our time; it subtly reshapes our bodies and minds.
Still, I do not believe the phone is our enemy. It is a marvel—a portal to information, connection, and knowledge that past generations could not imagine. But the danger lies in its power to occupy every gap, every silence, every pause in our day. The danger lies in how easily it transforms from a tool into a master.
That morning drive back from Islamabad forced me to notice something that had long gone unnoticed: my phone had become the rhythm of my body, a twitch I could not resist. And perhaps that is where the hope begins—not in rejecting the device completely, but in noticing. When I catch my hand reaching for it without reason, I try to pause. I try to let the silence breathe, even if for a minute. Because within that silence is where creativity, focus, and life itself have always lived.
Maybe the rebellion we need is simple. To sit quietly, just once a day, without scrolling. To meet a friend and leave the phone face down. To let boredom sting us for a while, until our own mind finds a way to answer. Our smartphones reflect our longing for connection, but if we never step back, we risk losing the very parts of ourselves that longed in the first place.
References
Alter, A. (2017). Irresistible: The rise of addictive technology and the business of keeping us hooked. Penguin Press.
Drouin, M., Kaiser, D., & Miller, D. (2012). Phantom vibrations among undergraduates: Prevalence and associated psychological characteristics. Computers in Human Behavior, 28(4), 1490–1496. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.chb.2012.03.013
Gezgin, Deniz & Kaya, Nazire & Sezen-Gultekin, Gozde & Gemikonakli, Orhan. (2018). Relationship between nomophobia and fear of missing out among Turkish university students. Cypriot Journal of Educational Sciences. 13. 549-561. https://doi.org/10.18844/cjes.v13i4.3464
Horvath, J., Mundinger, C., Schmitgen, M. M., Wolf, N. D., Sambataro, F., Hirjak, D., & Kubera, K. M. (2020). Structural and functional correlates of smartphone addiction. Addictive Behaviors, 105, 106334. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.addbeh.2020.106334
Ratan, Z. A., Parrish, A.-M., Alotaibi, M. S., & Hosseinzadeh, H. (2025). Predictors of smartphone addiction and its effect on quality of life: a cross-sectional study among the young adults in Bangladesh [Original Research]. Frontiers in Digital Health, Volume 7 – 2025. https://doi.org/10.3389/fdgth.2025.1351955
McDonough, I. The effect of cellphones on attention and learning: The influences of time, distraction, and nomophobia. https://doi.org/10.1016/J.CHB.2018.04.027
E. Ophir, C. Nass, & A.D. Wagner (2009). Cognitive control in media multitaskers, Proc. Natl. Acad. Sci. U.S.A. 106 (37) 15583-15587, https://doi.org/10.1073/pnas.0903620106
Roberts, J. A., & David, M. E. (2016). My life has become a major distraction from my cell phone: Partner phubbing and relationship satisfaction among romantic partners. Computers in Human Behavior, 54, 134–141. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.chb.2015.07.058
Wu, J., Fetterman, J. L., Cornacchione Ross, J., & Hong, T. (2025). Effects of Message Frames and Sources in TikTok Videos for Youth Vaping Cessation: Emotions and Perceived Message Effectiveness as Mediating Mechanisms. Journal of Adolescent Health, 76(1), 122-130. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jadohealth.2024.08.013
Yildirim, C., & Correia, A. P. (2015). Exploring the dimensions of nomophobia: Development and validation of a self-reported questionnaire. Computers in Human Behavior, 49, 130–137. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.chb.2015.02.059
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